Acorn Project: Ride the Snake

by Oskar Kollen

Act I
For us, fall is the start of a new year. Summer has finally come to a halt after months of festivals big and small.  This time of year means football, a nip to the air, honey crisp, and fall ‘tur. This particular fall is an exciting time for the band. With the release of our fourth studio album, Shift, and a major upgrade to our production, we decided to make this our best tour yet. We had the pleasure of taking our good friend Jonny Beerbox with us as lighting director and official ‘get your shit together’ guy, and Malpal helping us out with merch and keeping everyone calm.
The tour started off great with a double header in Bend and Selma, Oregon. We then had a relaxing stop in Sebastapol at our buddy Tenzin’s baller abode. Two days of poolside livin’ and a decident four course meal prepared by our bass player and master chef, Uncle T, we head to a new up and coming club in Petaluma called Zodiacs.
From there was a slow show in Sacramento, a ripping show in Nevada city, an over night drive, and a raging night on Ocean Beach in San Diego. It was OB where we met our new buddy band, the Brother’s Gow. After an all night soirée with our newly acquainted brethren, we head to Long Beach followed by a couple nights off.  Highlights: Beach cruisers, Paul McCartney, snake oil, carne asada, Squeek ‘little bitch’’ Scolari, and Aziz Ansari…

Act II
Northbound, I-5, in between Firebaugh and pungent cow fields, Master Sprinter starts spewing smoke and losing power. We pull her over as the sun begins to set behind the rolling hills of Nowhere, CA. Upon inspection the engine appears to have violently vomited oil all over the passenger side. Not good. Happy birthday Sammy… The tow truck takes us 124 miles north to Santa Cruz with a flat bed and an f350 crew cab to help transport the eight of us and our trailer. The following morning we get the news from the shop. Blown piston; $8,000-$12,00 and 14 to 40 days to repair. We were blessed to have good friends in Santa Cruz to offer up their vehicles so we could transport our gear from European motors to the gig at moe’s ally. After a great show that night, the club was nice enough to let us keep our gear on stage so we could take a uhaul there in the morning. After load out we stuffed eight of us into a borrowed  ‘97 Audi quatro. We were cram packed and ready to go. As luck would have it, the Audi wouldn’t  disengage the gear shift from park. We were stuck…
After 90 minutes of scratching our heads and reading the manual, we leave the car in front of the club.  A relatively short walk later we end up at Motel Santa Cruz at 4 a.m. The morning arrived quickly. Two of us rent a U-haul, the rest try and get the Audi to roll. Unfortunately the gear is still stuck in park forcing us to rent a car. We thanked our friend Flora, stuffed six deep into a midsize and rally north for the City by the Bay. Hours later at the Boom Boom Room a 28-foot 1-800-RV4RENT pulls up with the trailer in tow. This has become the most expensive tour in Acorn history.
A stellar show and some killer sushi, San Francisco always delivers with one of the best stops on tour. We picked up a couple of hitch hiking vagabonds headed north off the Golden Gate Bridge to build up some road karma and head to Novato’s Hopmonk. As the California leg comes to a close we can’t help but laugh about the situation we were dealt with. It cost us a pretty penny but in the end it brought the band closer and made for some of the best music we’ve ever played. We are so fortunate to get to tour around playing music and visiting with so many friends we’ve met over the years. The road handed us some lemons but it’s because of our friends and family that turn those to lemonade. The Payne family, you were in our thoughts the whole time. Everybody love everybody.
Colorado, here we come. “You better get ready.”
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